Writing a blog post while drinking

Pregame; Verb. To drink. Derived originally from tailgating before a sporting event such as a football game, it later became known as drinking before any gathering. It now refers simply to drinking, because any activity afterward is acceptable to drink for.

Deciding to write a blog while drinking and getting more and more drunk as I go; an unusual challenge that any good blogger would leap upon!

One corona

So tonight I am going out with Taylor while Nic's at rockclimbing. We've just come home from seeing Microsoft's prescreening of The Hobbit and Japanese food with Noah (who has the most fantastic name ever) and I now have 3 hours till Taylor comes to get me at 10:30 and am faced with two choices; find a balance between going-out clothes and the bitter winter, walk alone, catch a bus and go adventuring in the bars alone till she shows up (not all together a terrible idea, I've done this on other nights and had a ball) OR I can enjoy the warm apartment and pregame solo (lol aka drink alone) till 10:30 when she'll pick me up.

The decision has therefore been made that I shall stay home and boogie to music while I get ready to go out and that I shall write a blog post as I drink that shall not be altered at all and shall go through the stages of me getting progressively more and more tipsy as I retell stories of my adventures to you. Hooray!

Two coronas

Okay so I seem to be getting all my menial tasks out of the way now before I drink too much; eg bank transfers are a BAD idea when drinking, but facebook messages and emails to my gym are a good idea. I should get changed too and do my hair. But first, more meaningless story telling for you all! I shall give unedited musing on my time in the USA. For instance...

Observation: Things at the movies today were not as cheap as I was mislead to believe they would be in the states. I was severely disappointed by this reality... 

the popcorn tasted of ashes in my mouth... expensive ashes.

I should probably do my hair/makeup now before drinking too much. Probably, lol, but no. Instead I'll watch clips of Whose Line is it Anyway and prowl the internet like a 20-something does :D Then after another drink I'll tell you a story...

Just finished the second, hmmm how many standards are coronas again? Is it 1.2? GOOGLING IT! Oooo it's 1.3, so we're 2.6 drinks in! Gogo gadget maths skills. Time for a shower because this country is freaking freezing and that probably is a smart thing to do before we reach 3.9 drinks...

Corona 3

Okay so we're now showered and changed and sitting with a third cold beverage, the ordeal of doing my hair meant that the drinks are being well spaced thus far. So instead of just launching into my next America tale (the Wednesday, which is the most epic day I've had so far, so I kind of want to do it justice), I have turned to facebook for inspiration! I have asked for questions from friends pertaining to my travels and shall answer them now as they come in.

3 Coronas and a Blue Moon

My impatients wins out over being bothered to find facebook people to ask questions! Why don't American beers tell you standard drinks? That seems foolish, doesn't it? I suppose they didn't account for the demographic of young women who write blogs while drinking when they designed that labeling scheme. My prep time has reached the point of being basically ready to go out, hooray! And with an hour and 20 mins to spare :D I am side noting myself a little message to say "Hey Lisa, maybe leave this as a draft till tomorrow when you re-read it and decide if it's acceptable to post". Mainly because my rambling is most likely quite boring to read, though I do like to pretend that everyone is fascinated by the asinine musings of my mind, especially when drinking!

This drink is awful. Do not drink Blue Moons. That is my first answer to the question from Emma!

"What are the top 5 Do's and Dont's that aren't in Lonely Planet?"

Well, first of all Emma, great question and thanks for playing! I do NOT promise my answers will be at all remotely helpful. They will be completely tailored to my own taste and random rambling. Very specifically they will be about Seattle.

Do's:

1. Go to Pike Place Market. It's amazing value, good cheer and epic food. It's a lively, bustling happy market place and it's open every single day. It's also by the water front so it makes for an awesome walk and will always do the trick when you aren't sure what to do.
2. Talk to people! Cannot stress enough that the thing that makes my stories great is other people's stories. I can't remember if I'm supposed to use an apostrophe of possession there or not. I am a nerd. This only worsens when I drink.
3. Have at least one day going solo with no plans and start saying "yeah why not" to ideas, this will lead you on a merry chase!
4. Go to The Unicorn Bar, ChaChas, Sky High, Whirlyball and any other odd places YOU might stumble across, the fun is in the little places you find!
5. Embrace cold, inclement weather. Seriously, Seattle is known for its rain for a reason, you need to be on board with rain being "cosy" before you get here!

Dont's

1. Drink Blue Moon. This is the beer I'm drinking now, I do NOT like it nor recommend it.
2. Forget that life isn't always in the stories in your books or the preplanned activities. It's out there. It's in the little odd details, the moments and the fun you have when you're making it up as you go.
3. Waste too much time staying in and watching tv. I do this when I'm too lazy and comfortable; they aren't the stories you remember.
4. Berate yourself too much if somedays you DO sit inside and enjoy just watching tv and hanging out. It's okay to let your mind and heart go to where they want to be sometimes, even if that's just simply sitting with your brother in front of the fire watching a tv show you both love.
5. Stay sobre all the time. Yay, drink sometimes! Even if it means posting an odd rambling blog post. Do it, and enjoy the party :)

Seriously I am NOT enjoying this blue moon, let's get to another corona soon! Hopefully by the time I've answered this next question from Renee I'll be there!

"Favourite random American that you have to make/ear to stave off hunger?"

Uhhh... uh oh... am I too deep into beer land to understand this, or does it truly not make English sense? I interpret this question as "Favourite American...person?" and "how have you starved off hunger?" I'm sincerely doubting myself here (thanks Renee) but that's all I can glean from this...

My favourite American so far would have to be J. I haven't told the story of J yet, but he and I had a full day of being epic partners in crime in the market place together and he's one of the coolest people I've ever had an adventure with, so I'd have to say he's my favourite. You'll have to wait till next post to meet him :)

How have I starved off hunger? Honestly this is mainly because of the sheer generosity of a few people and my recklessness with money when I travel. My brother, Nic, has been insanely generous while I've been here and bought me a lot of amazing meals. I realise I'm a suck up now, but sincerely, it's been crazy sweet of him and I appreciate him to death for working hard just to treat his little sister to an amazing holiday :) thank you Nic! But I've also been spoilt by another friend M (also, upcoming story) while I've been here AND then the whole reckless with money and/or my weight while I'm over here thing helps. Sorry to the guy I'm going home to, I'll be fit and healthy for a while when I get back, so forgive my holiday laziness and gluttony now mwahahah. You ride the money wave while you travel you see... oh you don't see? I'll explain...

The money wave of Travel; (courtesy of Joe who educated me on this when we lived together) The travel money wave is a concept that explains your fluctuations in spending money when you travel. See you usually have a set amount...ish... that you're going to spend when you travel (This time I managed to squirrel away around $500 somehow right before I left), and you then begin your travel and RIDE THE MONEY WAVE. It goes like this...

YAY! We're travelling spend money wherever!

Oh, wow, we should slow down on spending, don't want to burn through all the money...

FUCK IT! WE'RE TRAVELLING, WOOOOOO SPEND ALL THE MONEY!

Whoa we're going to run out of money, let's be sensible for a while

Screw it, this is what the money was for, drinks on me!

We want this to last the whole trip, let's be thrifty for a day

Let's be reckless for a night!

I hate you

You love me! I love everyone! YAY SPEND ALL THE MONEY!

*Repeat indefinitely*

The money wave is a fantastic thing and such an odd experience. Enjoy it, you are never beyond its grasp. And the beauty is, once you're educated on it, you will never forget it! (You're welcome).

4 coronas, A blue moon and a diet Coke

Not going to lie, am a bit tipsy by now. Also that blue moon was hideous and had to be chased by a diet coke that I put this odd American "energy" elixer in; it's sort of like instant red bull stuff. Nic is also home, hooray! And is probably coming out with us. It's around 40 mins till we leave and I'm trying to bait him into catching ip with me in drinks (this may end badly). I've stopped backspacing if I make spelling mistakes so you can laugh at me in my coronary spelling mistake land. I still have some fan questions to answer before we can venture out into beer and dancing land!

"What's your favourite American phrase?"

I love saying "Sure" in an American accent. It sounds silly and different to our and they say it all the time. I've invented it as a sort of game with M whenever he (or now anyone else american) says it I repeat it quickly in an American accent. Since it's a game, it's now my favourite.

"Have you tried to pass yourself off as American?"

Yes, and semi successfully too, buit only ever in a bar (damn I spelt but wrong). It inevitably comes up as a point of conversation when you're out; the idea of faking accents. Apparently I can fake an accent better than most, but it's probably just from theatre and stuff, it's fun to put on an American accent. Meanwhile they CANNOT do our accent at all... 

...though to be fair its a weird ass accent.

Our next question comes from Dave! A man I become fonder and fonder of with every facebook appearance in my life he makes...

Does spraycan cheese have any relationship to actual cheese, and is there any kind of use-by date?

In my understanding, spraycan cheese is the second cousin by marriage of real cheese. It's the weird person your mother says you should call "uncle" who lives in a caravan "by choice" and can't seem to keep down a real job but is always "just on the edge of a great deal". With every bite you take of its spraycan goodness, it replaces part of your soul with processed glory. The use-by date is really just for amusement and was written by the creators as they smothered their laughter that anyone would ever even buy this shiz and put it inside their bodies. The apocalypse will see the survival of cockroaches, twinkies...and spray can cheese.

So somewhere around this beer and coke I have found myself singing along to songs, dancing and excitedly inviting Nic out too... back soon after this drink since I actually have HUMAN company (sorry internet... you know you're my real love, but this idea of "human" company is new and exciting!)

Two seconds later...

Nic: "I wonder what Cherry beer tastes like?"

Lisa: "TRY IT! \(^o^)/"

*Nic adds Cherry flavour to Corona*

"It tastes like... Cherry! Try it!"

*Lisa tries*

>.< BLERGH!!!!

"We're full of good ideas." ~Real Allen Household saying

This is the point I've decided beer is getting harder to drink. Hence I shall stop here... probably.

Lol jokes

Besides we have another question from the lovely Matt!

"Who has better pick up lines in the bars lovely? Americans or boys back home?"

Well, ignoring the fact that I have an epic boyfriend back home waiting for my silly ass to get home, I will objectively assess the pick up lines of men here and home. Though you guys are pretty universal with your techniques...

And I'm pretty universal with my technique...

The obvious difference is that HERE my accent does me huge favours, so I've had men use random intros like asking me which bars around here are good, and when I reply that they're probably asking the wrong person, I immediately get the same line over and over:

"Wow, I love you accent. Where are you from?"

I then get three wrong guesses and a perplexed guy haha but it's sweet enough that they find my accent charming. Though I have had the most "creative" pick up ever while I've been over here (see post; The Science of Glass and the Art of Picking Up) and in general since I go out solo a lot when I travel, the ratio of being hit on overseas to at home is a lot higher, so it's hard to compare. Plus the American accent is charming in its own right, so I'm amused hearing the men's pick up lines over here, even if they are cheesy sometimes. That said, I'm looking forward to going home to an Aussie guy :)


Ha I'm totally not editing this before I leave nor leaving it till tomorrow. DRINKING LISA FOR THE WIN!

PLAY A SONG!

This is what I'm currently insisting from Nic! And what better song could he choose as we fetch another beer than... TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES HYPERZONE HEIST! :D Excellent! Childhood and beers should always be mixed (If you want to give your psychologist more income) follwoed by the theme music from columns which we used to play on Sega Mega Drive! We are geniuses, which I have no hesitance in saying after a few drinks now!

*Lisa begins to excitedly shout* WE SHOULD PLAY THE GAME!
"What columns?"
"FUCK YES!... I actually meant the 3 headed broadway star game from Whose Line. BUT YES. THAT IS A MUCH BETTER PLAN!"

So while Nic tries to set THAT up I'll confess I'm stupidly excited to play columns though it's unlikely. Perhaps tomorrow. Crap we only have 10 more minutes! I should drink more! That's a good idea! And what have I learnt from one undergraduate uni degree and one year of med? It's how to drink hard! :D Sorry Dad, I know you thought it was a lot of medical knowledge... maybe that too... but mainly it was how to deal with high stress situations with alcohol :)

Yay med school!

Okay this has been awesome, we have filled in 3 hours of me drinky drinking more and more (trust me if you were here you could tell) but now I must away to the American night for more fun with Taylor, Nic, Dancing and AWESOME!!!!

See you all soon for a legitimate story!!!!